SACRED MARRIAGE by GARY THOMAS (BOOK REVIEW)

After my office (Shalom Delhi) relocation, I’ve started spending many of my time traveling in Delhi metro to reach my office and home too. My friend Persis ( i called her soulmate sister) therefore gave me a book last month to read while traveling. Since the day I started reading that book, I can’t help but realize how in odd places and circumstances, we can always create that environment to learn and grow. SACRED MARRIAGE by Gary Thomas has indeed attained the rank of a contemporary classic. The unusual premise of the book sets a powerful ground breaking perspective on “What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?"  A thought-provoking and challenging book where the writer treats marriage with a respect far greater toward God than for happiness which is fleeting, and that makes this book beautiful and profound. 

Gary Thomas’s excellent conversational skill in writing was so obvious from the way how the first sentence was formed till the last word written in the last 13^th chapter of the bestseller’s masterpiece. All the 13^th Chapters are critically presented and profoundly written. It almost sounded like a beautiful story book where you can relate to many of the human stories Gary has mention.

“Faithful participation in God’s kingdom invites and encourages others as we serve; it doesn’t diminish them.” The evangelical world tends to value “accomplishers,” people who get things done. The danger of this is that spouses often pay the biggest price for some of the accomplishments, and “true” spirituality can easily suffer as a result are some of the realities we faces and that makes Gary’s book more relevant even in our own professional and personal context. However the twist is this, when our marriage becomes our primary pursuit and treasure, our delight in the relationship will be crippled by fear, possessiveness and self-centeredness. The analogy of Christ and his church is the very foundation on which a true Christian marriage is based. From the practice of forgiveness to the beautiful physical intimacy, from sacred servant hood to the sacred history you and your spouse create together, the book embarks a very reflective journey with so much of possibility and potential for discovering and revealing Christ’s character. Personally, to look at marriage through the lens of holiness began to put it into an entirely a new perspective for me. Indeed marriage can become a doorway to a closer walk with our holy God.

The good news is, this is a book that looks and points beyond marriage. Building Christ like character is the main theme; marriage was simply the context because whether married or not, our primary goal is to please God and grow in that Christ like character. You don’t necessarily need to be married to read this book. Every believer can relate well with what the award winning author has prayerfully written. A must read for all believers. The book doesn’t at all make you feel guilty; instead it allows you reclaim your privilege and spiritual blessings God has intended. For me it was absolutely worth the long metro ride.

RECAPTURING THE ROLE OF WOMEN IN THE CHURCH and CHRISTIAN MINISTRY

It is very interesting to see how Churches across denomination are holding on to different interpretation and most often such contention are nullified either because of its strong church background or for many other reasons. So when we talk about women’s role in the church and wider ministry, I wonder if at all women can be trusted to do anything other than pour tea and snacks at the end of the church service or leading the Sunday schools. I know we’ve moved on from such situation but the question of inclusive theology and gospel in our church and society is still in the recovery process. Having said that, Apostle Paul’s view of women as mention in I Timothy 2:12 and I Corinthians 14: 34 has been one of the biggest sources of controversy and judgement too. Contrary to many interpreters, interestingly enough Paul had an inclusive worldview- an attitude that was rather extraordinary for his times. Many people have misinterpreted through different lens and have caused enough spiritual casualties. So personally speaking, I strongly believe that issues such as this deserve and qualify to be treated very cautiously and dealt with humility and with the soundness of the word of God and divine influenced. Otherwise, there are enough slippery slopes where our faith and beliefs can be easily sold out to what I can say as distortion and assassination of truth and God’s redemptive work. To many, the insulting implication is that any Christian woman who steps outside the lines of ecclesiastical propriety and presumes to speak for God or displays any level of courage is labelled rebellious, disobedient, or spiritually conniving. Collectively, we have cultivated that bizarre fear and so if we want to stake a claim that women shouldn’t involve in leading or preaching, do we assume then that the church have supressed and buried alive their spiritual gifts too or are we prepared to say that everything women and men have done to expand the kingdom of God was a mistake because women was involved and she was a leader too.

Therefore, the main objective and the backbone of this article is to acknowledge the fact that the inclusion of women in the Christian ministry is imperative but as believers and body of Christ, we have to ingrained it in our heart that the return of Christ is imminent and while all these quarrels and disputes needed to be resolved, our utmost responsibility is to carefully ensure that such contention doesn’t limit us from serving God fully and deprive us from making disciples, baptizing them and teaching them to obey God’s command (Matthew 28:16-20). As mention earlier, whenever any debates on women and their role in the church and ministry are laid out in the table, undeniably the first thing that comes to our mind is the Pauline’s perspective on women as mention in I Corinthians 11 and I Timothy 2. For a person like Paul, who was sharply criticized and disapproved by many early believers for all his past involvement and influences was later on significantly used by God to minister powerfully to all of them and one of whom was Peter. Paul ministered to them that there’s no difference between circumcised or uncircumcised because that was still debated strongly within the disciples. GALATIANS 3:27- 28 Paul edified the believers and the church that in Christ there is no difference between races or gender. “For as many of you as have been baptized into Christ have put on Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.” So interestingly it was the same Paul who said about the modesty of women and to what many considered it as imposition of the Jewish rabbinical law or in other words spiritual subordination. Many Christians are most familiar with a few passages in Paul’s letters that seem to denigrate women, keeping them in their place, and even silencing them. Perhaps we need to give these passages a fresh hearing, with special attention given to the original context. In Paul’s first letter to Corinth, he writes about the worshipping assembly, emphasizing the appropriate attitudes and roles. In one particular passage he speaks of the need for women to cover their heads so as not to bring shame when praying or prophesying (1 Corinthians 11:3-16). So, here’s the background of Corinth.

In 44 BC Corinth became a Roman colony under Julius Caesar and adopted Roman law and culture as its own. The population included foreigners and resident aliens from Egypt, Syria, Asia Minor, and other parts of the east Mediterranean who brought their own cultures and customs to Corinth. Paul was certainly concerned about confused and disorderly meetings aggravated by frequent interruptions. Because everyone is jabbering away at once, the content of good theology was not being communicated. This is why Paul supplies the theological basis for orderliness in the next verse"... … for God is not a God of confusion but of peace”. Against such development, Paul admonishes the believers in Corinth to stay in oneness and be united by the word of God. It is in this context that Paul says "let the women keep silent." It was also suggested that many women were guilty of misusing their freedom in Christ, including false teaching, to try to take over the running of the church. In such a case, Paul would not be speaking to a normal situation, but to a threatening division or at least disruption in the local church.

By saying this, the writer’s intent to convey that the main theme repeatedly found in the New Testament is that the special qualification to serve God and his people doesn’t at all come from being male or female but from the new birth. The coming of Christ inaugurated a “new creation” identity which transcends the law and the law that differentiate the uncircumcised, the gentiles, barbarian, Scythian; slaves are put to eternal rest by Christ redemptive act on the cross.

The new creation, chosen race, holy nation, royal priesthood, aroma, ambassadors, children of God, the bride… are all the entitlement and privileges for those who are in Christ. Before the Pentecost, circumcision was the sign of membership in the community but now it is only within the parameter of God’s grace that we are determined. So to override that new identity in Christ in order to promote what is convenient for us is nothing but to tamper God’s word and his will too. Therefore, withstanding the full involvement of women in the church and ministry including spoken ministry on the basis of gender is to deny the theology of partnership as intended by God. God’s providential love and mercy in choosing us and calling us are profoundly evident as mention below.

Joel 2:28 mention, "After this, I will pour my Spirit on everyone. Your sons and daughters will prophesy. Your old men will dream dreams. Your young men will see visions. 2.29 In those days I will pour my Spirit on servants, on both men and women. 2.30 I will work miracles in the sky and on the earth: blood, fire, and clouds of smoke. I shall pour out my spirit on a woman (daughters) and she shall prophesy but be silent? In Matthew 28:5-10, it was not only the angel but even Christ himself who commended women to go and tell the disciples about the good news of the resurrection of Christ. However interestingly in the gospel of Luke 24:11 it was mention that when the women went and tell the apostles, “But they did not believe the women, because their words seemed to them like nonsense”. After all what Christ taught them and showed them while he was still with them, they miserably failed to exercise their faith and believe what Christ taught them. May be they just can’t believe that God met those women first and not them or may be women are stupid and are supposed to be silent. I shall tell women to proclaim the message of my resurrection but be silent?

In Romans 16:1 (and the following verses), we see how many women believers supported Paul’s ministry. Special mention was given to Phoebe in 1-2, where she was addressed as deacon of the church in Cenchrea. “Deaconess” was not a word at that time and was first used in AD 375. The common word “deacon” is most often translated “minister” in the King James Version. Paul called himself a deacon in 1 Corinthians 3:5 and it is used for Timothy in Acts 19:22. Deacon is used with “co-worker” (synergos) and commonly meant someone who teaches and preaches; the person would have some authority in the church. Another thing to consider is that the term deacon was masculine and only males functioned as deacons in Greek culture. Paul knew very well what he was doing when he used that term for Phoebe. Many churches today quote I Tim 3:1-7 and Titus 1: 6-9 as a set of standard to elect ONLY men as elders in the church. Elders and leaders in the church need to be men (not women), but what about Phoebe who serves the church in Cenchrea as deacon (minister)… a silent deacon?  Acts 18:24 now there came to Ephesus a Jew named Apollos, a native of Alexandria. He was an eloquent man, well-versed in the scriptures. 18:25 He had been instructed in the Way of the Lord; and he spoke with burning enthusiasm and taught accurately the things concerning Jesus, though he knew only the baptism of John. 18:26 He began to speak boldly in the synagogue; but when Priscilla and Aquila heard him, they took him aside and explained the Way of God to him more accurately. I shall tell Priscilla who instructed my servant Apollos to be silent? Was Apollos spiritually emasculated when he submitted to Pricilla’s correction? Absolutely not. His ministry was strengthened actually.  Acts 21:8…The next day we left and came to Caesarea; and we went into the house of Philip the evangelist, one of the seven, and stayed with him. 21:9 He had four unmarried daughters who had the gift of prophecy. I shall tell Philip's daughters to prophesy but be silent? How about we assert that women remove their braids and gold necklaces when they come to church as Paul says in 1Timothy 2:9? Probably not. We don’t regard these as universal. But when we come to verses that restrict women’s participation in ministry just a few verses later some suddenly view those verses as binding on all generation, for all cultures and for all times. Why? Throughout the early Christianity and church history, many women missionaries were church planters and were courageous in their faith even to the point of dead. These women were not looking for a spotlight or a pulpit, nor were they out to win an argument or to prove that women are better than men. They were prayer warriors who loved the Word of God and used it skilfully to combat the evils of their day. They were mothers of the faith who nurtured new converts with the milk of salvation and obeyed the Lord. Can the church then accuse them of blasphemy?

I know this sounds primitive, but many Christian institution /churches hobbles about on one foot because it is unwilling to give women their rightful role as competent Christian co-workers. By saying this, am not trying to set up propaganda that women MUST be allowed to, instead it is God who chose us. He called us. So when that choosing /calling is already been initiated by God, why at all then do we have to choose again on the basis of colour, gender, status etc.  We know that Christ is the new covenant and in him all distinction are dissolved. He is the mediator and the high priest. Surely then, our deepest convictions should come from a positive response to the gospel of Truth, the gospel that profess the supremacy of God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit. The Father will not fulfil his purpose outside the church (the bride of his son). Our main goal as believers (both men and women) is therefore to become more like Christ each day, he must become greater and we must become less (John3:30). So then, the church should be a redemptive force amid oppressive traditions and cultures. The church should then recognize the calling of both women and men and assert our true Christian dignity as found in the bible whether it is Old Testament or New Testament. Although discussions on women’s roles in worship and ministry are significant, attention should also focus on how men and women might serve together as co-workers in Godly partnership and engage in the sphere which God has ordained for both and to that end, may the God of peace, the great Shepherd of the sheep, equip us with everything good for doing his will, and may he work in us what is pleasing to him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen.